Pre-liminary notes: I've finally best thought of how to describe my style and how I connect with fashion.
EDIT: This was an old draft that I have finally finished and hence has some old experiences in there. I have watched a tonne more episodes of the HBO series Girls.
* I have no idea what images best exemplify this train of thought and I am FAR TOO LAZY to draw something. So enjoy some images from Style Bubble, run by Susanna Lau possibly the best fashion blogger with power-clasher intent. You go girl. *
I just watched my first episode of Girls (second season, episode three I think... might be episode two though). As awesome as it was and as much as I did enjoy it, there were still feel of slight discomfort since it mainly followed one set of characters doing cocaine from the toilet lid of a club in New York. The other protagonist was having sex with a really strange and disturbed artist who had old dolls and blood stuff in his house which looked like an office. One good thing did come of it, and I think I will watch it on a weekly basis from now until university starts up again since there was just so much witty dialogue and empathy for the characters. What I really admired from the script was the term "power clashing"- which really describes the way I dress and why I buy things- I'm drawn like a hapless moth to a bug zapper for anything printed and with colours because it just starts such an interesting conversation.
On their own it's interesting enough when I have to tone down an outfit for a family function or when out with my mother buy by myself I can really cause some mischief and mayhem with an outfit.
I think it all stems from my love of Tavi Gevinson and who other people admire courage of wearing outfits that are weird or just above the norm, breaking the boundaries and things like that. She bought stuff from thrift stores and would layer things up in unusual ways, leading to some very tangled things but also well-composed and extraordinary photographs of the results which she famously showcased on her blog. We love the unusual and daring, plus it sticks in your mind if someone has a good outfit that isn't exactly expected-of-everyday-life either and it makes them unique. Some people have called out this culture of eccentricity and I really am sick of the hate. Becase I don't think modern fashion blogging isn't necessarily stemming from people trying to out-compete each other and out-weird each other. Don't you think you can give us a little more credit than that? It's about finding what suits your tastes and expression of self. Although I still don't feel like I can define myself and what I like one hundred percent, I am comfortable with who I am and what I do to express my artistis side. I feel hampered when my mother is still hyper-critical of what I wear when I go out with her, often hearing two minutes of her saying "ew" at me isn't the best start to a day out in town. But it does help me build a tough shell and I think that's vital to character building too.
It's always interesting to see more than one aspect of how someone dresses as well- as opposed to the same theme of pretty princess dresses and the same structure day in and day out. I don't want to name names but these are some people I follow- because I need angry motivation sometimes of a "I can do better than that" mentality, which I answer with "well, why don't I then?". It's probably not the healthiest but I think it works and they still evoke a good inspiration of ideas. Of course it means that these bloggers are confident in themselves and have perfected how they want to present themselves and that's great, but I prefer to maintain that variety is the spice of life and I think the easiest way to make a day interesting is to have a great outfit or something like that. Even adding a small little badge with a weird saying or popular culture reference can help you to socially network; given the right time and place. I don't have a wardrobe of everything similar but instead have collected bits and pieces over the years that don't necessarily all work together. For the moment it is just fun to realise finally when something old I own and something new I've bought can work together in a really spectcular way and I want to try and channel that everday. Otherwise I will have a huge wardrobe and STILL manage to feel like I have nothing to wear.
I might well be crazy for romanticising and trying to infuse the simple ritual of getting dressed with so much importance and ceremony, but it is honestly a passion of mine at the moment. I spend most of my income, when I am not busily trying to save on clothes and accessories for my wardrobe and I mostly sell my old ones on eBay as well to make room for the new. My boyfriend prefers to get DVDs and create a collection and we mutually respect each other for having our own niche to fill. Fashion isn't a calling to me, it's not a way of life. I can take a break from it and there are times when I altogether forget about this facet of my life when something else consumes my schedule. But it occupies a special space in my head and that feels like enough at the moment to keep me happy. I can waste hours and hours looking for stuff on the Internet and thinking of combining things together in a cool way that I don't actually have in my posession. As soon as my brain wants to cooperate and thinks creatively about the clothes I actually do own, then we'll see some decent creativity. Until that happens and while I am still trying to figure out my life, I thank anyone and everyone who has read or just simply clicked on my blog because it feels like a reward/ support system/ scoop of fertilizer to help me grown and develop as a person interested in fashion.