it's a blue, grey and dull collage post that greets you today; composed
and put together in the mystical and ethereal state of being last night.
I've decided it's time to have sleeping habits like a normal person
for the rest of the holidays which means no more sleeping in for two
hours, getting up and being industrious like my brother the jogger. My
father also out of habit gets up early, but he mostly cups tea and plays
solitaire. Anyway, the point is I am grouchy and tired. The only reason
I haven't collapsed back into the land of sleep is with another strong
mug of cappuccino in my super hero tool belt, half watched DVDs and a
laptop from which I can blog from anywhere. There's also the minor inconvenience of a full bladder after having four and a half cups of tea last night which I know is an old technique as far as getting up and early is concerned but it still works.
walked past a Salvation Army charity shop yesterday without so much as
crossing the road and dragging my father behind me to search for
curiosities. The main thing is that I only had five dollars with me at
the time and hadn't exactly planned to make my way down there but now I
regret it. What's a little embarassment between father and daughter? Probably a week of torment knowing my luck. While I feel content that my room is a bundle of nuggets of
plastic from my childhood and gold to work with in terms of crazy pretty
girl shrines, I under estimate the appeal of a good wall hanging and
poster. Also religious relics are beautiful and probably abundant in a
lot of places like that- making ends meet by the donations of other
people. I know it's perfectly fine and reasonable that my room will not
be perfect and translate well in photographs, but that hardly makes me
want to stop trying.
Oh hey there sting rays fancy seeing you here- I am now up to watching Flight of the Conchords which features some lovely but trippy animations of killer whales and sea sponges grooving along in the opening credits. It's only till I got up and took a second look at what I piled together in the heat and fever of last night and realised there were actually a few photographs of marine life. Also, disposable camera quality pictures of bands with electric guitars. Coincidence? I think not! The world doesn't hand out coincidences like confetti guys, they are rare and cosmic events that highlight the importance of weird slimy ocean creatures and electric guitars. But by no means
should you combine them together when the guitars are plugged in for
heavens sake- this is not like a Sum 41 music video and diving board
Image Source: Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone
Anyway the creepy coincidence of it all kind of creeped me out a little bit this morning, then I realised it was actually awesome that aquariums and music do go together very well aesthetically. That's nothing new though- I wasn't the first to pioneer this realisation but I kind of wish I had know. As long as I don't let this trend fade into obscurity though, I'll know I'll have done my job right. Maybe my contribution will be making band merchandise in the cheesy form of snow globes. That will probably only be marketable amongst fans of André Rieu and One Direction. Oh dear- I don't know much about their fan bases other than unfair stereotypes. I'm more familiar with t-shirts to wear proudly for hardcore and metal acts... Perhaps it's time to head back to the old drawing board and stretch my imagination a bit further. (None of the above made sense; but I refuse to apologise for that)
At the moment I am tearing everything old off my bedroom walls and am starting a new- revealing white washed plaster that is as close as I'll get to snow. That is the only issue I have with Summer holidays, which can be easily forgiven because I have another two months left of lazing about. I read something inspiring which is an excerpt from an interview with Sweden's favourite folk sister act; First Aid Kit.
"JOHANNA: Because things constantly change. I mean,
that’s the point of life is to change. If you don’t, there’s nothing
interesting going on."
At which point her sister chimed in with agreement.
"KLARA: And Johanna just said the meaning of life."
Despite my room being my cupboard/ secret spy headquarters/ place of solitude it's never quite felt like 'home'. I'm not really sure why; the easy road to take would be to complain that my parents never stressed the importance of tidying and cleaning the space in which I lived. Little did I know that it would play a vital role, something that I was missing, over a decade later in my new literary hobby. At the age of seven, I didn't know I could make my room into an expression of art. It was just a place that I slept in and held all my stuff at the time. What was cool about that? After not picking up toys after their use, clothes lying about the floor for days, weeks and then months the mess spiralled out of control and twelve years later, this plague and hurricane of untidy nature is still at large. But now things have changed- I'll be responsible for my own house and living space.
It's time to get real and I want to do my best to honestly curb this misdemeanour of my behaviour- do my darnedest to have pretty crochet things and fix it all with lots of glitter or something. The annoying thing is being a child of the twenty-first century and accustomed to Internet websites emulating life at home I long to "start a new account because I messed the first one up". Unfortunately, life does not work that way- we have to learn from our mistakes and there is no wonderful short cut to making everything in my room look nice. At least my shrines will have pretty abodes and permanent places to live once I am finished and I'll be reunited with the lost art of making paper chains with fake daisies.
As beautiful as these images are, I know deep down in the permanently pessimistic, stereotypically teenage cockles of my heart I will never front a band. I will never be on the same stage as a totally tight and close-knit band of musicians because I can barely manage the same with friends. Also it's been a while since I actually picked up a guitar and attempted to play something- instead I let my finger nails grow so I can get my money's worth out of nail stickers. I don't know what is sadder; my cyclic abandonment of pursuing music and enjoying being a part of playing an instrument intimately or the fact I feel so poor I sacrifice that opportunity to practice for a few cents more of specialised sticker.
I feel ravenous. I feel ravenous for language and possibly a better vocabulary. Slowly reading through 'War of the Worlds' is helping piece by piece but I am also reading it at the same time as Rookie Yearbook One while burning the last of my scented candle and redecorating my room a little. It's up to me to make my own fun for this evening because my boyfriend is hanging out with some friends from work and my mother is watching television in the lounge room. Therefore I cannot play ten-year-old video games. The options I am looking at so far are re watching/ looking up knitting tutorial videos on Youtube, watching more of Flight of the Conchords on my laptop or sitting around here continuing to blog while drinking tea. Knowing my lame ass, it will end up being the final choice of three fine options. And to think, people I know are waiting to see Two Door Cinema Club play tonight. *sigh*
Image Source: Anna Karina in Pierrot Le Fou
As the year winds down, the quality of many television programs drops off since they just become pensive and reflect on what was hot and what was not. When I reflect on a year that was different, exciting and very much the first step towards my new adult self, I remember research papers for Biology. I had two to do this year, one for each semester, and both were angled towards a marine perspective. I don't exactly know if I would like to become a marine biologist- one girl I took a particular disliking towards for no real reason other than being me being a weird, envious and disheartened bitch was the daughter of two marine biologists. I don't even understand- for some reason that made me a little antsy. Next year I'll be doing a double minor in Biology looking at animal structure and environmental aspects which should be fine and OK. The problem is that I did minimal reading this year and had never done Biology before so without falling in love with dreamy images of angelic gliding sharks I should probably rectify and reconcile my laziness in terms of my textbook before falling headlong in pursuing a career based in that area.