My hormonal rage is finally at a halt and my insides no longer churn uncomfortably when thinking of the fondest, most living people in my life. I feel righteously relaxed and have been in the company of my boyfriend for the last two weeks and blogged by night, sipping coffee in the mornings simply because I enjoy the taste and not due to reliance on it and the inability to focus my weary eyes. Everything is falling into place as it were and I'm without a care in the world- exam results don't nag at me and I'm just focused on improving my driving as well as blog post flow. I wasn't able to indulge in any of these guilty pleasures last year and simply focused on getting good grades for university acceptance but I no longer strive for academic perfection and am instead more energised by thoughts of the literary and aesthetic.
I have strange anxieties about letting people get to know the real me and become close- it's traumatising to bare your soul to people and allow them to hurt you but it would be devastating if they did take advantage of your deepest weaknesses and vulnerabilities. I've enjoyed watching Pokemon DVDs and walking around the city for no reason though and feel a constant warmth knowing that I have someone special in my life that cares about me so much- I didn't intend for this blog to be a personal rant space or mush of lovey dovey feelings but it's nice to put how I feel into words every now and then. Call it a guilty pleasure.
I've neglected my room cleaning in the last few days as well as the sad expectation that I will ever turn my room into the haven and utopia for style, living and general coolness that I so desire, but I do feel pretty rowdy and ready to tackle the dust after seeing the above photograph. I'm familiar with the use of wet-look/ metallic material from the avant Gard era of the 1980s but never before had I seen it used in interior decorating. I think it's time I retreat to my room, put on the Scott Pilgrim movie I picked up today and began sorting through loose litter post haste.
I've been sucked in to the superficial fashion world as of late and caved on a few purchases I could probably do without, but I am being productive and selling things I no longer wear and use. Shoes have been my usual fascination and weakness, but hand bags are on the cusp of being my next addiction with a few I've had my eye quietly on for months on end. It's almost like waiting for the passionate explosion of a volcano, rather than a flower. In nature the blooms of plants come soon enough and coincide with seasons but volcanic activity is unbridled and at times, furious. Much like my intrigue in fashion and outfits at time. There are lulls and spectacular peaks. There's no such balance as yet.
I've lamented on several occasions my desperation towards owning the perfect pair of creepers, and never had it occurred in my closed mind at times to get hot pink. I had naturally assumed that the only choice was really black and variations on the midnight shade, but there's such a heart-warming quality about these hot pink and sinfully gritty creepers. The balding and scuff marks across the toes as well as black and hot pink laces really make them the outstanding statement piece that they are- and tattoo printed skin colour tights couldn't hurt either.
The basis and penultimate goal of many religions aside from praising gods from chanting or prayer is the enlightenment and absolution of the soul in which good and evil are balanced in a state of serenity. Not raised with a strong religious background I am quite content to cuddle next to me counterpart who balances me out and with whom I am with peace sitting next to. My boyfriend and I often quash and half sit on each other on my couch while stretching out our legs- it's cosy in winter but in summer I'm sure we would be at each other's necks and not romantically either. I loved yin yang symbols throughout primary school and wish I had been able to clap eyes on this mystic feline mixture of black and white, good and evil. It would however be a little more settling to believe that good and evil does not live in out hearts in equal quantities, but I have yet to be sure of this.
I have a lot of time on my hands at the moment but I still lack the motivation for DIY projects such as studded colours, leather or denim jackets as well as gloriously thick gold chains. I feel inspired but it would even be easier to draw this image in pencil rather than hunting through second hand stores for quality clothing as well as craft stores for many metal studs left for me attach at my own devices. I have found many great studs online for customising clothing but as I said before I take pride on my nails and not breaking them by attaching studs.
The Queen's diamond jubilee is over, along with all the pomp and circumstance of the monarchy as well as proper British block parties and tea at high noon but it seems for some old habits die hard and creepers shoes can be worn for any occasion and reason really. I am a little apprehensive about the nature of wearing bright electric blue as a pair of shoes but the sweet Union Jack settles all queries I have about the design of these shoes. Ripped denim shorts and a soft knitwear would be ideal to wear with these shoes but I do crave a bit more of a challenge when coordinating outfits.
watch Japanese cartoons and listen to alternative rock for nights on end. We all like to play pretend sometimes.
I bought a diary at the start of this year with the intent of drawing, scribbling and everything in between it to catalogue the year, the year that was meant to be 'my year' but I've been pretty behind on all that. My blog acts as a small inspiration pin board I can access electronically and without the risk of vulnerable paper getting damaged but I still like the hand drawn approach. I like the stylised combined with the tangible and controlling the movements of a pencil like a painter to brush- although I am much more of a keen pen user myself. It's also quite easy to save images from Tumblr with unknown authors and silently praise them for creating smashing pictures.