I know I'm meant to be seeing the new Star Wars movie in 3D which will be good for my social life, but I went out yesterday and I am quite tempted and content just to spend the day in my home, alone and writing up articles on my blog. It seems next week will be a frenzy of activity as well so I want to enjoy the last few days of holiday as well as computer trolling while I can, but maybe I would enjoy myself by coming out with the girls and doing something enjoyable. Do I begin to ease myself into a busy and social schedule once more with people and in situations I'm familiar with or do I go out with a fight and resist the social future by hiding in my cave behind a computer screen all day? I know I prefer the no-mess and little work needed to maintain my appearance in private... but I really should go out again today since I have work tomorrow and I'll earn the money back anyway.
I've put together a little collage of satanic and creepy photographs and I think the saddest thing about this one and it's caption is the hopelessness of the situation and lack of faith in the human race. I was very much once so drowned in the anguish and dim-reality of depression and despised everyone around me. I radiated heat and felt it at the back of my throat trying to rush out my mouth at times when I was angry and upset. I'm quite glad that's all behind me now.
The largest rituals I would be willing to perform are those which involve feeding a black cat and possibly collecting rosaries- but never in my life would I dream of reattaching them inverted and make a mockery of their symbolism. Shown upside down and above, Jesus on the cross held by a black cat with big golden eyes filled with big black pupils may seem foreboding for those that are the religious type, but I'm afraid for someone of my upbringing it's fairly mundane.
As well as the odd satanic rituals, there's just good old images which evoke the 1960s such as floral wreaths and long blond hair being shaken about in the wind. My childhood lacked a religious and spiritual outlet but that never really bothered my before- in America the Australians were met with the Christian culture shock as well as some who attended church with their host families. I could have been one of those lucky few, but luckily they chose to attend the children's soccer game instead. That was the temple and the prayers and songs were replaced with the helpful but intimidating banter of an Angry Soccer Mom.
I would make a terrible candidate for satanic rituals and being sacrificed in the name of some god- for one thing I can imagine the whole ordeal being very cold and impersonal and I get self-conscious easily. I can't sleep without any clothes on unless I've taken refuge under the covers and wrapped myself in a neat little cocoon of blankets. The candles and crosses would be a nice touch for scenery but I'm afraid my days of burning candles obsessively, tending to the flame and wax levels are over. I think I may develop an unhealthy and costly obsession if I decide to buy another one...
I prefer to think of myself as the hapless victim dressed in white dress, lying on a beach somewhere and becoming victimised by my 'saviours' trying to work off a thousand year old debt. Fortunately I'm not in a movie, don't wear white if I can help it and also don't own a pair of thigh high stockings to tease the boys. It's not stocking weather yet anyway and so I usually prefer black when it boils down to giving my legs a little extra warmth and layers to protect them from the cold. White is just such a naughty nurse stocking colour to wear... not very classy these days.
Although there are many colourful and delightful clubs to join at my university as well as volunteering positions it seems that none of them include chanting in a pentagram, surrounded by colourful wisps of incense, droning in an ancient language without any clothes. I wonder if the photograph above was staged or indeed if some hapless art student stumbled across this scene in his local park and decided to get a snap of it. I would predict staged though, the angle of the scene is above, indicating the use of a tree branch or step ladder to elevate one's position from the ground and create an angle for the photograph.